Giving negative feedback

Last night, husband and I were watching "Dancing with the Stars." I can't come up with a good reason why we were watching DWTS, but we flipped to it for a second, and once you even start watching with the slightest attention, there is just no turning back. Part of it might have been that the first "star" we saw dancing was the subject of earlier discussion from our working on the "Bigger Dance" draw, but that's another story.

Anyway, we're watching, making our own assessments of the pairings, comparing our takes on the accuracy of footwork with those of the judges, etc. In a flush of just that, you know, being in love thing where you're just happy to be with your partner and madly in love and all that gushiness thing, I turn to husband and say, "you know what?"

The "you know what" was going to be something like, "I'm crazy about you" or "how did I get so lucky" or some other little such comment. But that requires that husband look me in the eyes and say, "what?" with the right tone of voice that gives the permission to get a little gushy, cue the music, dim the lights.

Instead, he looks at me and says, "is this going to be a criticism sandwich?"

A criticism sandwich is what the DWTS female judge, Carrie Ann Inaba, does very well. She gives a bit of positive feedback first, then the negative feedback (with a smile), then ends on a positive note. Generally speaking, romantic sweet nothings given in the form of a criticism sandwich would, I think, defeat the purpose.